4.18.2011

In This Marriage


It's my anniversary this month! It will be two years since me and hubs tied the knot. There is no possible way that I can believe that it has been two years already. Anyhow, is it bragging to say that I have an awesome marriage? If it is, then this is me bragging. Here are a few things that I've learned on the go that I thought would be fun to share.

My top 10 secrets to an awesome marriage:

1. Marry someone you have fun with
Do I have to explain this? Do you want to spend the rest of your life with someone who bores you to death? Think of your best friend. I'm guessing you have fun with this person. Your hubby is your new best friend. Have fun with him.

2. Never take yourself too seriously.
This is really an overall life rule for me. Let's face it: when you are with someone so much, weird things are going to come up, weird things are going to happen. Learn how to laugh at yourself. Honestly, it just makes life more fun.

3. Let things go.
Don't hold on to past grievances. Deal with issues as they arise, and then leave them where they belong: in the past. Everyone makes mistakes, you wouldn't want the husband pulling out your fault list every time you made one, so don't do it to him either.

4. Pick your battles
Some things are worth going to battle over. Some things are not. If you don't want to be fighting all the time, then choose to only "discuss" the things that are major issues. You've heard the phrase "making a mountain out of a mole hill," if everything is a mountain then you will never be able to cross them all and you will never move forward. So knock over those mole hills without causing an incident and move on.

5. Prioritize
I'm just going to say it: your marriage is a big deal. Your spouse is a big deal. Look, your husband is your partner in life. You need to invest in him. And you need to make time for each other. Date night is not something that should fall by the wayside once you get married. In fact, it is even more important. There are so many little things that demand our attention everyday, make sure you remember to shut them all out once in a while and focus on each other.

6. Don't keep secrets
There is no place for secrets in a marriage. I'm telling you: either they WILL come out, or they will eat you alive. Why did you marry this guy if you don't want to share your life with him? I'm not saying you have to share every unimportant detail with each other. I honestly don't want to hear what my husband did every second of every day (and I'm nosy!). If it's an issue/important/dangerous to you or your marriage, spill the beans.

7. Try new things
There are no two people who are exactly alike. We are all unique and we all have different interests, including your spouse! Maybe you hate museums but he loves them, hit up a local one some weekend. Maybe the thought of sushi freaks you out but he has been craving it since you got married, (barring allergies) try it out! Not only will this allow you to experience new things (and maybe surprise you), it will also get you out of a dating rut (not that YOU ever get in one) and, most importantly, it will show your man that you care about him and the things that he cares about.

8. Make time for yourself
I know you love your husband. And if you're a newly wed, you probably want to spend all your time together. That's great! But make sure you also make time for you. Read a book, go for a walk. Don't get into the vortex of "us" so much that you forget about "me."

9. Speak up
Something bothering you but you're too afraid to say anything? Is there something you've always wanted to try? Bring it up (in a loving and open minded way). What's the worse that could happen, really? I said it before and I'll say it again: you want to spend the rest of your life with this person. Might as well get things out on the table now rather than holding on to them for the next 20 years. Your husband can't read your mind (or so I've been told).

10. Get dirty, a lot
And have fun with it. You know what I'm talkin' about. That's all I'm gonna say.

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